Friday, November 30, 2012



Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Today I chased the dusk. 

It was getting bluer and darker and the clouds were turning pink. 
The light was fading, as always, as usual. 
Too soon. 

I was sitting in my chair, in my studio, looking up at the sky. 
Into the window. (Where this glass tile now lives. Julia made it on a trip to a glass factory. It is really beautiful.)

And then it was dark, not dusk. No more fading sky. Just a black sheet draped over the entire world.


Peace, stillness.
(Stillness of self
under this graceful
moving thing.)

This is a mobile by Calder made in 1954.
At the art museum today. The painted blue wall is for the ancient Greece exhibit, but I think it was really meant for Calder.


Monday, November 26, 2012

Today is day 165. That means, only 200 more days until this year is over. 

That's a lot, but also 165 is a lot. 

Crystalized light. 
This is strange. 

My stomach is on the verge of rumbling even though it's 11:27 pm and I've had dinner (and dessert.)

I think I will go appease it with toast. 



A foggy morning

This was one of those times I was glad to have keep snapping the shutter. 

Ali a few minutes before experiencing the waffle window for the first time.  

I like this, it feels like the way you experience a bridge. 

I took this on a day when I realized I hadn't taken any photographs yet, and this was the last thing I saw. It strikes me, somehow. A insignificant moment in time. 


Sunday, November 25, 2012

Because I haven't in a while. 

Here's a self-portrait shot in my studio. That big black curtain of hair is, in fact, mine. (Though not black in real life, that's just contrast, people.)

I like this, so simple. 

Today I organized most of my negatives from the past three and a half years. It is really strange to see my life spread out on the floor, dated and chronological. It's strange the improvement, the phases, the little things I forgot or wanted to continue or the things I didn't know were important at the time, but are. Negatives are a beautiful thing. Little pieces of your life saved forever, no pesky hard drives accidentally erasing entire sections of your life. (Of course there's always the natural disasters.)

Even stranger is negatives without light. They are positively ugly without light, this weird plasticky surface that slips and slides and attracts dust. Then, shine light through it, hold it up to the window, scan it, and boom. A world. 



yesterday I wrote a letter to a friend. 
edited a roll of film. (soon to be posted.)
and rented a movie with ze boyfriend. 


Friday, November 23, 2012

And, lastly, today. Friday.

Here was my day:

I woke up late, Steele was still being a sleepyhead and I wanted orange juice, so I went out and got coffee, perused the sales at Urban Outfitters, went to TJ's and picked up a few things, and came back to him on the couch watching football. I of course kicked him off football and we spent the next few hours watching my TV ;)

And also deciding when and where to get our Christmas tree. I am really excited for Christmas. Mmm. Haha. I even put on my Christmas socks last night right when we got home. Hahaha.

Today was 100% normal, really nothing to report. I took some photos with the 35mm. I'm not really sure how to handle that here on the blog. If I wait to get them back I'm so backed up but what's the point of posting every day if I don't have images. Any of you silent readers out there with any ideas, you let me know. I could update this post with images, but who would go back and see them? Ah, I don't know. Oh well.

No poignant closing sentence for you tonight.



(For the record, I wrote this last night. Just didn't post it because of the backlog.)

Let me talk a little bit about today.

I woke up with Steele pulling the covers around, complete nonsense. My alarm was going off, but my phone had been set to vibrate and in my sleep-mind I thought that had some correlation with it being a holiday. Like it wouldn't really be loud because it was the holiday alarm.

We made pumpkin pie, I had gone out yesterday to get all the things, including a pie-dish, which we did not have. I find it really funny to begin acquiring all these things that "grown-ups" have in their homes. It's a strange feeling to know I might have this pie-dish for 20 more years and to be able to say something like, "I got this pie-dish when Steele and I were 21." (Although I honestly hope not because it is not really the highest quality pie-dish.)

The light was really beautiful today. It was sunny, bright, cloudy, white, crisp, soft, all of it. I am so grateful (read: thankful) for light. Truly. I think it is one of the best parts about life. I am also thankful for Steele. I'm thankful for the family we're building together. (read: not pregnant, a family can be made up of two.)  I don't know how to sum it up in one sentence, but if I try it might be something like this: everyday I spend with him is whole. Whole in the unbroken sense. Not necessarily perfect, but entirely complete.

I'm thankful for my friends and the little tiny community I've created here. I was going through my archives and read a post when I started OCAC about how I knew I wouldn't be fully comfortable until it was almost time for me to leave. And it's true. I've finally grown into this place, I feel like I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be and I'm so happy to be surrounded by the people I'm surrounded by. And it is almost over.

I'm thankful that I have a way to capture the things in my life. Not just with images, but with words. Not just with instagram, but with 35mm film too. I can't imagine my life without these little residues, although I'm sure it would go on and would, in fact, be a life. It would be unfamiliar to me. So I'm grateful for this blog. For my ability to see and think and comprehend, even a little bit, my memory. 



Wednesday was the first day of break. Which means, we slept in, and then got up and got some coffee, and I cannot believe I didn't take any pictures. But I didn't. I was recovering from Tuesday. Also I went to the store and got ingredients to make mac 'n' cheese, and pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving, and chocolate coins to make an advent calendar.

Basically I burrowed in to the couch and watched TV and made a few crafts and ate homemade dinner and some ice cream.

That's all, and that's all it will ever be in my memory.



On Tuesday Steele made us breakfast after we slept in a little. There was a moment that I photographed and that was, after I made coffee and sat down at my typewriter to write, and steam was coming up from the cup and so I grabbed my camera and snapped. And outside it started raining very hard at that point. Harder than Portland sprinkles, like real rain.

Tuesday night Steele and I went out, which is not the kind of blog post I really want to write, but it was fun and I had a good time with all of our friends. (& let me say I am very happy Steele was there to take  care of me.)

I'm waiting on the photograph of the steam.


What you are about to witness is a mass blogging of the past week of my life. Starting with:


On Monday Steele helped me make some boxes for the Holiday sale in the wood shop. So here is a picture of us looking really nerdy in some goggles. 

I'm sorry that I don't remember more details but, I don't, which is why this whole blogging and photo taking this is so important to me. So now you have to build my life up with the basic facts. 


Sunday, November 18, 2012

I spent most of today in the print shop finishing up these mono prints for the portfolio exchange (we make an edition of 20 and trade with everyone else in the class.) My prints are a variable edition, which means they're all slightly different. I did these 'painterly' faces. They're sort of a departure from how I normally work, which is clean and controlled. Though these ultimately ended up being really clean, they were very instinctual to do, and very fun. And I find them beautiful. I almost don't want to give them up.

I titled them, "my conscience found its new name"


Saturday, November 17, 2012

It's been about a year since Steele and I started an Instagram account. (I started it on his phone, and eventually he started using it also.) I think I might get a bit cheesy when I talk about why this silly image application has ended up affecting our lives so much, but, it's true. Instagram is stress-free. No one cares if you post a really silly picture. Instagram does not require the use of a big bulky camera. You take more pictures that you otherwise would. (The phone is always in Steele's pocket, a short grab away.) It's not advised that you take yourself too seriously with Instagram. Yes, you may apply colored filters to your images. Yes, you will be seduced by the filters. Yes, you might put a blur effect on your images. You might be seduced by that too.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, there's just something so accessible about this media. It's an instinctual method of working. You take an image before worrying about what it means, why you wanted it. And somehow that lends the most real things, sometimes. It reminds me of 35mm film. No pressure. Just shooting.

So many images from the past year wouldn't exist without Instagram. I pulled a bunch that I love, things that I want to keep forever.

Left: A moment I snapped at a picnic, on my way to grab something far away, I don't know why I didn't have my camera with me, but I had Steele's phone in my pocket, saw something that caught me and snatched it. Right: Rain on Steele's windshield before getting out of the car, wormhole.

Left: Steele's old bed first thing in the morning, the view into his neighbors driveway. Morning time is prime time for Instagram, as I almost never have my camera near me. Right: The light switch in my old bedroom. A homage to the time I spent there.

Left: The very finest saw dust on my leg, my shorts acted as a block and I noticed it and found it interesting. Right: My fried egg. Absolutely one of my favorite little "series" (I say series lightly because there isn't much intentionality behind it.) is our kitchen table, documenting meals. 

Left: A building by Newspace, Steele had picked me up and always love how this building looks at dusk but hardly ever capture it. Right: Ali in the painting studio, one of my favorite photographs, and definitely something that wouldn't have been spurred by anything other than the iPhone in my hand.

Left: A drawing of Steele on the first day of summer, we were sitting out in his front yard with some paper and pens, no camera. Right: A cup of cider that I brought in the car, I was holding it in my lap and noticed how the light caught and wanted to capture it. (I did photograph this with my big boy camera as well, I wanted a higher res version, but there's something about this one I couldn't replicate.)

Left: The crumb plates from my birthday morning croissants, another kitchen table photograph. Right: My studio photographed right after before I left for the day. Impulsively shot and somehow very much loved, ideas spreading out.

(You can follow Steele and I @steele_brittany )


I think I need to find some new photo communities and working photographers (that are present enough online.) The people I've followed for so long are growing father and father away from me in relevance. (Or rather, I'm growing away from them.)

I just can't be bothered with conceptual portraiture right now. I'm too focused on what I'm doing, which is, being in school and thinking about the nature of photography and how I use it. And it turns out, I do not use it to do conceptual or fashion type portraiture. I use it to capture every day moments. 

I still like setting up a scene and spending hours running back and forth from the camera. I just find myself doing it less and less often. And in the past few weeks, instead of making myself feel bad about that, I've been thinking that maybe that's just not what I need to be doing right now. 

So I won't. 

This blog will continue to be random images. Some digital. Some film. Some shoot with a tripod, some not. Some iPhone, some Instagram, some abstract, some tender, some boring. There will continue to be posts with only words. Posts with only lists. Posts with half-hearted words. This is my life, now. 

And I'm okay with that. 

(In other news, I dropped of a roll of 35mm today and am really still excited about the photograph of the spoon in my cereal milk. We'll see. Expect it Monday or Tuesday.)


Friday, November 16, 2012

Artifact from day 155. 


Wednesday, November 14, 2012

The truth is,

I don't feel like posting a blog today.

So consider this my non-blog.


Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Today I took a picture of my leftover cereal milk with my cereal spoon resting in it.

I will post it when it's developed.

I'm so tired and have a headache.

And other, non-rational, non-blog things.





Sunday, November 11, 2012

bed sheets. 

a photograph is a two dimensional thing. that's three dimensional. 

(what is a photograph with no information?)


Saturday, November 10, 2012

This morning was really foggy and I snapped a bunch of frames with the 35mm Pentax.


no pictures today, on the blog, but in time (soon.)

Today also happened to include:

Lots and lots of copyright learning.
Happy hour with a friend.
Sleepy-sad Steele.
(Followed by dinner-Steele.)
Trailblazers game, and TV.

Sometimes posting 100% average things like this feels like an insult to the blog.


Friday, November 9, 2012

Just something I snapped about two seconds before I walked out the door. 

Today was filled with lots of boring things. Not really blog worthy, but I'll write a list:

Time on the couch in my PJs and glasses. (You know if I don't bother putting my contacts in right away it's going to be a lazy day.)
Two slices of pumpkin bread, plus a muffin for good measure. 
Feeling accomplished for a cooking a real lunch. 
And a few 35mm frames shot at the bus stop. 

(Also a paragraph of imaginary prose about the romance of power lines.)

35mm XXVII

Party supplies

The cutest kid ever, and his mom with a slice of pizza in the drivers seat.

All white skateboarder.

Frozen time

The backseat of Ali's jeep.


This pretty much sums it up.

Fall Day (film 146/365)

Thursday, November 8, 2012